Exercise is BAD for my health!

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So…I wrote earlier today about slowing down. I’m trying. But my doctor and Kay insist I not slow down too fast or I may come to a dead stop. Begrudgingly, I’ve started to take their advice. I joined the health club as a Silver Sneaker or something like that.

This morning Kay and I worked out before going to Costco to get the Prius’s tires rotated, a precautionary move similar to exercise – regular tire rotation will keep the tires from dying before their time.

The tire rotation appointment is for 1:00. It takes 45 minutes. We walk around Costco, get a few groceries, have a bite of lunch, pick up the car, load the groceries, start driving home, and remember we need gas.

It’s after 2:00 p.m. now, past time for my nap with Barclay, but I pull into the gas station, pull up to the pump, stop the car, do the credit card thing, insert the gas hose, and start pumping. Then it occurs to me to check out the windshield for cleaning.

“Are you okay, Sir? Are you okay?” asks the young man who’s come to my aid.

I’m face down feeling old and foolish. “Damn gas hose!” The hose was too high for leg muscles exhausted from working out. I had tripped over the gas hose.

Kay is oblivious to all this, sitting quietly in the passenger seat, her head down, traveling elsewhere in the universe, texting someone not lying on the ground next the car.

“What happened?” she asks as I get back in the car. “I fell. It must have been the exercise. I’ve NEVER tripped like that before. I told you. Exercise is bad for my health!”

• Gordon C. Stewart, Chaska, MN, Feb. 5, 2016